It’s inevitable; at some point in our lives we will encounter it. It’s not a good feeling – it hurts, it can even sting, especially if you never saw it coming.

This feeling that I am speaking of is: rejection.

The key is, once it happens, how do we deal with and then overcome it? It is a difficult task, but you my friend, can overcome it.

As a proud member of the “Forty and Fabulous” club, I have had my bouts with rejection. It has tried to become my secret BFF on many occasions.

I’ve dealt with rejection from my father as a child, boys as a teenager, the “popular” cliques during middle school and high school, job opportunities, and men who I thought would be the perfect mate.

Can you relate? I’m sure most of you can.

Bob Marley said, “You never know how strong you are until strong is your only choice.” Whenever you take a risk, there is a chance that you may be rejected.

Here are 3 ways that you can deal with rejection in a healthy way:

1. Deal with it.

It may sound harsh, but sometimes we have to take an honest look at ourselves, ownership of the situation, and just deal with it.

You can never truly move on if you can’t deal with your current situation. Evaluate and ask yourself three questions: “How did I contribute to this happening?”, “What could I have done to get a different outcome?” and “How can I prevent this from happening again?”

You may not like the answers, but you need them in order to move on to bigger and more fabulous things.

2. Talk to someone you can trust.

We all need that trusted friend who is open to listen judgement free, but will give it to us like we need to hear it. Often times, it is extremely difficult to expose our vulnerabilities to someone else. When we do, we want to make sure it is with the right one.

There is a certain sense of comfort that you feel with this person. Someone you are not afraid to cry in front of and be your beautifully flawed self with.

3. Create an action plan.

Everyone likes to have their own pity party once in a while, right? But what do you do afterwards? You have to make that action plan.

My mother always tells me, “If you fail to plan, then you plan to fail.” This can seem overwhelming, so just take baby steps.

Start by writing down daily goals that can turn into weekly, monthly, and quarterly goals. Then focus on yearly goals that can become a five-year plan, then ten-year plan…you get the picture, right?

You can even get help with your action plan from a trusted professional like a life coach, therapist, or counselor. This person is unbiased and can provide the accountability you may need.

These three steps may seem difficult to follow, but trust me, once you follow them, you will forget how challenged you once were and remember how fabulous you truly are.

Remember, it’s okay to be knocked down but the important question to ask yourself is: “Did I get back up?”

Conquer and rise above it.

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