I’m staggering, speech slurred
I can’t see, my vision’s blurred
I need a designated driver for when I’m drunk in love
When I’m intoxicated and stumbling I need someone to lift me above
Lift me into bed, put the covers over my head
Make me a home remedy, not coffee or a raw egg
Drive me to my limits
Soon as you get up in it
I’m drunk, damn near passed out
Designated driver get me in the house
I’m safe within your arms I need a designated driver for when I’m drunk in love.
When I’m intoxicated and stumbling I need someone to lift me above
My drunken stupor when I’m incapacitated
My designated driver will drive me home and put me to bed
Make sure I’m not all alone
Friends don’t let friends drive drunk
Be your friend’s keeper
Don’t let me behind the wheel
I need you to look deeper
Don’t let me drive drunk
They say Jesus take the wheel
That’s my designated driver’s job
He knows how to make me feel
Drive me home, drive me crazy
When I’m drunk in love nothing fazes me
I need a designated driver to get me home safely
Sobering under your care is the place to be

I know I’m safe from harm
Not driving in these streets
You’re designated to take care of me

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